1. |
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Well, they gave me those pills when I was a fourteen year old
Pale faced caving stone
They said they wouldn't take what I was,
A shitty spoken word from diary covered in blues and reds and forgotten thoughts
Emasculated by a red finger nail
Hanging, pus filled ready to burst with my blood and my boiling sense of isolation
I was a shooting fucking star in my own right
I was a picture perfect frame for your empathy
However broken and boring you swore that I was
I was always even more so empty
I bit the drywall clean through off the doorframe
I punched a hole in the middle of me
I drowned in the bathtub over a decade ago
I was just dreaming of being at sea
I won't be sharing this, my own obituary
A coffin loaded with the rocks that you knew
And oh the wheels were so much easier written than the vast expanse of nothing that I found from you
And I'm fucking up like I said before
You're over ambitious, over exhausted and scared
I wanna find those force from the words I wrote
Wanna collapse under the filth in my hair
I wasn't ever fucking beautiful
I was just tired enough to dream that I was
I'm now a burning fucking photograph
Enthusiastic reason listed, simple "because"
You are a toast to the youth that I never knew
How did your skin feel when you were inside?
Where did the lonely nights go and the ceremonious mornings
How did it feel when you didn't wanna die?
How does it feel to know you didn't have to give every ounce of you to leave the floor?
I wanna know, I wanna know I gotta fucking know
What I was clawing at the ceiling for
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2. |
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am the birth place of animosity
My sweaty skin sheds off my broken bones
I'm over dramatic, a sunken poet begging for eyes
I am the closed doors to the room where I died alone
Perfected focus drew my yellow eyeballs back
My bubblegum legs, overgrown and dry
I'm burial grounds in the early morning
I'm loosely attached to the broken lights
My imagery has gotten boring
My whole gimmick has run its course
I'm unsupportive and unsupportable
Related through an eon old divorce
I'm lightning fast, a jumpstart on a train
The tracks derailed and spewing fire and glass
I'm not sure of the skeleton just yet
But I got a feeling that this shit just won't last
I haven't felt that fucking good in a lifetime
A heavy anchor at the bridge of my nose
I'm getting old and I'll keep aging
But it gets better or so the story goes
I've widened up my peripheral but the beauty fades
It's not the time and it's not the fucking place
I'm just unlucky in the sense that I'll be forever blessed with this skin
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3. |
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And I've been fucking up my words as well as
Any self important and set deprecating starving artist before me
And I'm alive just like grave robbers
Stealing thoughts from people pockets
People I don't know and am too ashamed to admit that fact to anyone
So watch me squirm and watch me die
Watch me get eaten a-fucking-live
It's no better than the songs I sang as decades sprinted by
Watch me implode, so starry-eyed
I played my part and bled my pride
And it's only when the night gets hungry that I keep myself inside
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4. |
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I swam too close to the coast of your collar bone
Your puddles drained through the cracks in your chest
My applause conceited, an itemized dementia
Slippery slope, God complex
I share with you this sinking ship feeling
The metal making its nest in your guts
I'm so sorry I couldn't find better words than
"Modern art, a loveless fuck"
I'm out of touch and out of step and out of line
And I can tell that there's that feeling I wanna die
And as I write you from a thousand years ago
Before modern medicine
I pray to god you won't lose your mind this time
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5. |
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6. |
A Little Quiet
00:32
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I'm Constantly distracted
by all of my distractions
I'm finally taking
account for all my actions
Your doctor gives you pills
Everyone else just gives you shit
we play the loud music
so we don't have to deal with it.
Yeah
We like the music fast
yeah
we like the music loud
a little faster now!
a littler louder now!
A little quiet now
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7. |
Happy Birthday
00:35
|
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Do I think too much?
Or is it not enough?
Will I come around?
Or stay out of touch?
I cling to cliches
I keep it classy
Dad, Mom, I'm an artist
Please don't laugh at me
Do I talk too much?
Or is it not enough?
I couldn't find the words,
I think I'm out of touch
I'm trapped in this prison
of meat and bile
The only thing that keeps me going is denial!
What do you want for your Birthday?
I want to disappear
What do you Want for your Birthday?
I wanna be anywhere but here
What do you want for your Birthday?
I want you to leave me alone
What do you want for your birthday?
I wanna go to bed early, I wanna go home.
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8. |
KILL
00:55
|
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I came
to Kill
I came
to make your blood spill
I came
to kill
I came
to watch you lose your will
I don't give a fuck
about your family
I'll watch em die
right in front of me
Murder can be fun now
don't be anxious
who give a fuck when
It's state sanctioned
propagating death
border after border
be proud ma!
I'm a fuckin' warrior
And when I'm at the end
of the bloody road
folk at home will call
Me a hero!
I'll be a fucking hero!
I came
To kill
I came
to watch your blood spill.
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9. |
Grind
00:32
|
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|
Think about it every day
Get me out of this pit
I'm so over it
Put your hands in the air
If you're through with despair
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10. |
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hey everything, fuck you
i hate everything you do to me
i despise every lie i've come to believe
and i hate every evil thing that i see
this juxtaposition of good and bad
remind me of the best and the worst dreams i've had
i'm either to happy or fucking sad
and i can't keep up with that
and my job what a shame
just a mountain of death filling up my brain
i'm always tied to the tracks of the train
desperately afraid of going insane (like my family)
and i' like to take advantage of a flock of wild birds
to make to make my escape from this planet
christ almighty i am thirsty
i'm forever fat and ugly
stumbling bumbling bastard stubbly
faces will always be hungry
and i don't know if i'm capable of helping anyone
i'm at the mercy of emotions of my better friends
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Cricketman Huntington, West Virginia
West Virginia ska cryptid. Do not be afraid of CRICKETMAN!!
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